Dating Advice
How to Be a Great
First Date
By Terry Hernon
MacDonald
Okay, you’ve scored a date with a sexy somebody
for Saturday night, and you’re terrified you’re going to blow it.
Don’t worry; if you follow these tips, you’ll do just fine. The
bonus? None of them involves getting a face lift or renting a
Jaguar for the evening.
1. The key to being a great
date is to love yourself. Nothing is more attractive than an
individual who regards himself highly. It doesn’t matter of you’re
short, fat, bald or hairy in all the wrong places. You’ve heard
the maxim, “You can’t love somebody until you love yourself,” and
it’s true, but nobody else is going to love you until you love
yourself, either. Self-love attracts love like a
magnet.
2. Resolve to be yourself
and only yourself. Don’t tell me you’re not interesting enough,
good-looking enough, smart enough. Ask yourself: Do you want your
date to like you for somebody you are or for somebody you aren’t?
Right. Now, be yourself, and understand that maybe your date will
like you and maybe he or she won’t. Either way, you’ll live. I
promise.
3. Visualize quiet
confidence. For several days before your date, visualize yourself
sitting with him or her and feeling calm, cool, and attractive.
Really feel it! See, hear, and feel yourself laughing easily. Feel
yourself smiling. Practice this while you’re waiting to order your
coffee in the company cafeteria. Do it in the Laundromat. Feel it
until it feels real.
4. Make a list of all the
things you have going for you. A great sense of humor? Compassion?
Beautiful teeth? Are you an executive at an up-and-coming company?
Write down your desirable qualities and read the list several
times a day. Let it sink in. Knowing what makes you special will
give you confidence and an inner glow on the big night.
5. Now that you know what
makes you wonderful, keep it to yourself. No need to turn the date
into an infomercial: Avoid mentioning that you’re considered the
unofficial mayor of your town because you’re so popular. Don’t
brag about how you trounced Texas Tess in the chili competition.
Allow your date to make little discoveries about you. Trust him or
her to see that you’re an excellent catch.
6. View your shortcomings as
positives. A healthy person will be drawn to you despite the fact
that you drive a 1987 Chevette, as long as you’re kind,
considerate, and funny. If you’re ten pounds overweight, there are
people who will find you sexy because they’ll perceive you as
being slightly indulgent. If you’re a man who’s balding and
consider it a disadvantage, decide to make it an advantage. Many
women see a disappearing hairline as a sign of
virility.
7. Have reasonable
expectations of the other person. What’s more revolting than a
paunchy guy who expects his girlfriend to look like Paris Hilton?
Or, a woman in a dead-end job who turns her nose up at the guy
driving the 1987 Chevette? If you want to find somebody who will
like you for you, be sure to return the favor.
8. Don’t stereotype. All
women are not desperate to get married. All men do not fear
commitment. Purge your noggin of the nonsense the media have fed
you about the opposite sex. Look your date in the eye and
treat him like a human being, not like somebody you must
manipulate. Treat your date as you would have him or her treat
you. You will be successful beyond your wildest dreams.
9. Remember, it’s a date,
not a job interview. Don’t view this person as a potential spouse.
Remove the pressure. See him or her as an acquaintance you’d like
to turn into a friend. That’s it. Break the ice with a compliment,
but avoid making overly personal remarks like, “Wow, you look hot
in those pants.” Something non-threatening like, “Nice shirt,”
works well because it conveys that you think your date has good
taste!
10. Stay away from sex. I
don’t care if you’re a man or a woman, sex on the first date is
bad news. Don’t even think about it! Having sex on the first date
sets up all sorts of weird and uncomfortable expectations.
Furthermore, you could end up with a deadly disease. Hit the
sheets only after you’re sure you’re both healthy, and that you
actually like the other person. It makes for much better
sex.
11. Accept the possibility
that you’ll be rejected. Maybe you and your sexy somebody will hit
it off. Maybe you won’t. When I was single, I often reminded
myself that even Bruce Springsteen (the biggest, sexiest rock star
of the time) faced rejection by the opposite sex at one time or
another. So have Britney Spears, Brad Pitt, and all the other
luminaries we’ve been trained to envy. Everybody faces rejection.
Everybody. Not just you!
After the date is over, decide whether you’d like
to see this individual again. Stop fretting that you didn’t make a
good enough impression and ask yourself if you even liked him or
her. Review the evening dispassionately. Is he or she someone you
would choose for a friend? Did you feel good around this
person?
If not, it’s probably best to move on.
If the answer is yes, proceed
accordingly.
Terry Hernon MacDonald is the author of "How to
Attract and Marry the Man of Your Dreams." Visit her website
at http://www.marrysmart.com.
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/
